Warning Signs of Abuse

Warning Signs of Abuse

Abuse can be inflicted in many ways, in many places, and by a range of people who have power over their victim for a variety of reasons. This can make abuse difficult to identify, but this article tells some warning signs of abuse you can be aware of. Abuse can range from out-of-bounds demands on a worker by an employer to verbal, physical, psychological, or sexual mistreatment in venues that range from home to work to school.

Abuse can be inflicted by family members, so-called friends, teachers, employers, bullies, and romantic partners. Because abuse is so varied in its type, perpetrator, locale, and effects, the signs can be very different in different case, making abuse difficult to identify. Here is some information that may help you to pick up on warning signs of abuse. It's good to be aware that a single sign may have explanations other than abuse, so while being careful not to jump to conclusions, if you notice these signs, you should seriously consider the best course of action.

Talking About It . . . or Not In cases of abuse in which the abusive conduct is not criminal but definitely out of bounds, (for instance, a boss expecting an employee to do personal errands for him or her or a person making unreasonable demands on a spouse, child, or other family member), the person who is subject to the abuse is likely to complain about the situation.

Even though the mistreated person may not confront the abuser, he or she may be quite vocal with friends and family or even with colleagues. So complaining can be a sign of abuse.

This type of abuse can grow insidiously and slowly take over the victim's life. Because the encroachment is slow, the victim of this type of abuse may need a reminder from outside to recognize how outrageous the situation has become. When the situation is more dire, victims may speak out at either the first instance of abuse or if something changes in a way that makes things insupportable.

For example, a woman may put up with an abusive husband, but leave if she perceives her child to be in danger from him. However, in many cases, abuse is not discussed. Often, the person being abused is the victim of criminal acts, ranging from assault and battery to rape, and is too afraid, embarrassed, guilty, or ashamed to tell. An abuser may threaten a victim, making him or her afraid to tell. In addition, a victim may feel that the abuse reflects poorly on him or her, making the victim ashamed or embarrassed to tell. If the victim was warned against the abuser, then he or she may feel guilty for having gotten involved with him or her.

When this approach is taken, warning signs may include secretiveness, rather than complaints.

Now You See It; Now You Don't

Physical injuries occurring with no reasonable explanation or occurring frequently may be another sign of abuse. The victim may try to cover these up with long-sleeved clothing, make-up, scarves, or other means.

Another thing you may not see in cases of abuse is the victim. Especially if they live in the same household, the abuser may want to control the victim to the extent that the victim is rarely allowed to leave the house, no longer allowed to be in contact with friends and family, etc.

 If someone you know is not only out of touch, but either doesn't answer the phone or has to end calls suddenly, as if fearful that innocent conversations are unacceptable, the source could be abuse.

Children Who Are Being Abused

The signs of child abuse may be more obvious because children are likely not to be as skilled at covering them up, but many of them may not point directly to abuse, but could be the product of a variety of issues or even, in some cases, just one of those moments in normal development.

These warning signs that may not prove abuse, but may point to other issues that should be followed up) include:

trouble sleeping, whether difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep or nightmares or not wanting to go to bed or fear of the dark mood swings or depression and withdrawal loss of appetite on the one hand or food addiction on the other seeming inattentiveness or daydreaming regressive behavior that would be within the normal range for a younger child anxiety injuries that do not have reasonable explanations substance abuse change in behaviors like hugging or kissing parents goodnight truancy running away self-injury suicide attempts or ideation secretive behavior
Changes in toileting behavior, including pain, knowledge of sexual activity or vocabulary that is not age-appropriate, or sudden strong negative reaction to be touched are signs that are less equivocal.

If you suspect someone may be being abused, but the signs are not clear, seek the advice of a trusted professional, either a licensed health care worker, a social worker, or a minister, priest, or rabbi. If you are afraid there is serious abuse taking place now or a crisis, it may be wise to call a crisis hotline or the police.

http://www.troubledteen101.com/articles69.html

Breast feeding

Childhood physical and sexual abuse may increase risk of early or late onset menarche

Childhood physical and sexual abuse may increase risk of early or late onset menarche

Published on July 28, 2012 Researchers from Boston University School of Medicine (BUSM) have found an association between childhood physical and sexual abuse and age at menarche. The findings are published online in the Journal of Adolescent Health. Researchers led by corresponding author, Ren-e Boynton-Jarrett, MD, assistant professor of pediatrics at BUSM, found a 49 percent increase in risk for early onset menarche (menstrual periods prior to age 11 years) among women who reported childhood sexual abuse compared to those who were not abused. In addition, there was a 50 percent increase in risk for late onset menarche (menstrual periods after age 15 years) among women who reported severe physical abuse in childhood. The participants in the study included 68,505 women enrolled in the Nurses' Health Study II, a prospective cohort study.

"In our study child abuse was associated with both accelerated and delayed age at menarche and importantly, these associations vary by type of abuse, which suggest that child abuse does not have a homogenous effect on health outcomes," said Boynton-Jarrett. "There is a need for future research to explore characteristics of child abuse that may influence health outcomes including type, timing and severity of abuse, as well as the social context in which the abuse occurs."

Child abuse is associated with a significant health burden over the life course. Early menarche has been associated with risks such as cardiovascular disease, metabolic dysfunction, cancer and depression, while late menarche has been associated with lower bone mineral density and depression. "We need to work toward better understanding how child abuse influences health and translate these research findings into clinical practice and public health strategies to improve the well-being of survivors of child abuse," added Boynton-Jarrett.

Source: Boston University Medical Center http://www.news-medical.net/news/20120728/Childhood-physical-and-sexual-abuse-may-increase-risk-of-early-or-late-onset-menarche.aspx

Michelle Obama: Most Powerful Mom?

Michelle Obama: Most Powerful Mom?

According to Working Mother’s Top Ten Moms of 2011, Michelle Obama ranks as one of the ten most powerful moms in the world. 
 
As much as I respect Working Mother magazine, and delight in Michelle Obama (along with most of the world), I beg to differ. 
 
Michelle Obama IS popular, with approval ratings close to seventy percent. But popular flies a different flag than powerful.  Of all the women in the world I admire, Michelle Obama is the one from whom I’d like to see a little more power-flexing -- and a whole lot less bicep-flexing.
 
The last interesting quote from Michelle Obama was her now-infamous February 2008 campaign cutline that America’s support of a black presidential candidate made her proud of her country for the first time in her adult life. I was intrigued by her heartfelt words. As an educationally and economically privileged white American woman, I wanted more on the subject from her.  Of course it’s harder to be proud of this country if you are black, given our history of slavery, economic discrimination and voter intimidation  -- but as a white woman, I’d rarely thought about patriotism in that vein. 
 
Obama opened my eyes to the still-prevalent prejudice black moms face in the workforce, in the polling booth, and in raising children.  She made me think long and hard about what it would be like to be a black mom, holding a child’s hand on the first day of kindergarten at an underfunded and overcrowded public school, or driving with kids in the backseat through a predominately not-black neighborhood, or taking a gravely sick black child to a hospital staffed mostly by white doctors and nurses.
 
But instead of praising her candor, conservative media and rival politicians portrayed Obama as the stereotypical “angry black woman.” These howls effectively silenced Michelle Obama for the rest of the campaign and the first four years of her husband’s presidency.  She’s hardly spoken up since - in public, at least.  Probably to the satisfaction of her husband’s press office, but to our collective loss.
 
We see Michelle Obama plenty.  She’s regularly smiling and pumping her arms on the cover of Vogue, People, Ladies Home Journal and Reader’s Digest. We know the contents of her closet and where she shops. We know her height, her weight and her shoe size.
 
But do we know the contents of her mind?  We rarely hear her opinions on any subjects of substance.  I for one have seen enough of her upper appendages and her designer clothes, and read enough bland dogma on home-grown vegetables and aerobic exercise, to last me several lifetimes.  Are fashion and body-toning tips all we can expect from one of the most highly educated First Ladies in history?
Please don’t interpret this as criticism of Ms. Michelle.  I don’t imagine she has a lot of leeway.  I’m sure there is immense pressure - from political advisors, the black community, her husband, the watching world - to play her role as First Black Lady on the safe side.  First, do no harm is a critical political and societal goal for the only black couple to head the White House.  Maybe she’s just presenting an image palatable to Americans squeamish about a smart, powerful black woman running the White House - just as many celebrities craft an image to sell records, win elections, or raise capital.
 
Hands down, Michelle Obama has won the nation’s popularity contest.  But one of the primal lessons of feminism is that power outranks popularity.  I’m willing to be Michelle Obama has realized that, too.
 
I’d like to get past the image Michelle Obama projects - and to hear more of her opinions.  Particularly on the subjects she knows firsthand, the thorny topics that bedevil women today.  The importance of education in leveling the gender and racial playing fields (Michelle Obama went to Princeton and Harvard Law School).  What it’s like to be the major breadwinner (she out-earned her husband financially until she became First Mom in the White House).  How to juggle career and kids gracefully and without resentment.  The value of live-in childcare help (her mom moved to DC along with Malia and Sasha).  What it is really like to be the first black First Lady in America  -- something I, and the rest of the white women in America, know zilch about.
 
However pragmatic her strategy, I fear we’ve all lost something invaluable - the opportunity to hear from a black career woman, equal rights advocate, and mom with plenty of moxie and mind capital to share with our country.  Perhaps, whether President Obama is re-elected or not, the freedom from popularity polls will mean more straight talk from his wife.  I, for one, will be listening assiduously.

http://www.mommytracked.com/19939?page=0%2C1